Buttercups

His hair continues to fall in his face

Even when cut

I don’t want to be built up

Only to be let down

Clumsy and we can’t help it

 

He speaks a million words a minute

And I would travel a thousand miles

To listen to and absorb

Every single one

I want to learn everything

That he could possibly teach

 

Strength in fragility

I thought we were completely different

But we’re practically one and the same

Schools of fish in the deep baby blue

Students of life

And all of its wonders

 

He is older than me

Yet seems so much younger

So wild, free, and put together

Sugar sweet poison

Yellow, the “happy” color

Yellow is my favorite color

 

Flowers line the city streets

Like petals on the ground

Of a wedding aisle

His smile is seriously beautiful

I long to be his special girl someday

And I’m screwed because of it

 

 

My Heart Seems to Become More Open Every Time It Breaks

Small town girl

Big city girl

Suburban gothic

In my sometimes lonely world

 

You cut me open

And I never stop bleeding

Even after that wound heals

I’m an emotional livestream

 

Alone, I fall apart

Alone, I put myself back together

Picking up the pieces

And flinging them like ashes

Into the ocean

 

Cried tears in oceans and rivers

And I’ll do it again

As many times as needed

Low self-worth took a toll on my mental health

But with each lost love,

I learn how to love myself

 

I remember my younger self

And how I always wanted

To make myself proud

From feeling small, I grow

 

I was vulnerable with you

And you took advantage of it

As a result, I found strength in it

And received a kingdom of love

After the reign of pain

 

To figure me out,

You have to figure out my heart

As Below, So Above

I’m going to play with words

Because they are all that’s left

They are always all that’s left

The rabbit followed me to the hole in the sky

 

This is all I know

All I’ve ever known

Skipping stones across thin ice

Melting bonfires down to candles

Laughing at sob stories

Crying even when I’m happy

 

Repeating procedures

Even when there’s proof that they don’t work

Telling me to let go makes me want to hold on

Table for two

Reverse psychology for one

Counting down for no reason

 

It’s been years

Haven’t aged a day

Die a little bit every week

The end of the beginning

 

Wrong in the head

Right in the heart

Take me to a giver

Make believe that reality sets in

Wait, can we start over?

Fragmented

I can still make you smile

And I can’t stop missing you

Took a trip through your galaxy

And there’s still more to uncover

 

I see the real you

I wish you could see

More of the real me

It’s a good and bad time

Our hearts are stuck in limbo

 

Falling in love

Just to fall apart

Not alone in loneliness

Drifting further down the river

Peacefully

Until we shatter on the rocks

We could put each other back together

If we wanted to

 

Almost asking-

Begging

For another heartbreak

There is love here

Somewhere

 

You walk away and let me in

I push you away and open my heart

Patterns or survival?

I want to be in your arms again

But I don’t want to fall onto my knees again

I know my worth

If only you did

 

If it’s meant to be,

Then it will be

If you wanted and needed me,

Then you would show and tell me

For right now, you would just break my heart

And eat it too

 

 

State of Martyrdom

We’ve taken a break from outside communication

To form a deeper understanding of each other

Creating connections for the long run

I’m sleeping awake

While you’re dreaming in front of me

The upside is going down

Insides are spilling out

 

The numbness wears off

When my feelings hone in on you

The air I’m breathing is fresher than before

Yet, the butterflies refuse to migrate

I never said that you’re my only source of happiness

I never said that anything is guaranteed

No one and nothing are in our way anymore

Life has become more “with” than “without”

I can’t change your mind for you

 

Crying about difficulties is much easier

When you know for a fact

That you’re not the only one

Drop the act for just a moment

For the uncensored truth

I seem to find you every time you’re jaded

Look, we match!

Same thing happens when we’re better

 

We’d love to be in love

Circumstance pulls us apart

And slams us back together

Hearts underground like tectonic plates

Surrender to fate

Revolve Around the Red Rose

Stuck on you

Like my favorite season

Ongoing episode

Lovely weather

Muse of the century

Longing for forever

 

I want to share my mind with you

You’re the home my thoughts consistently return to

I open my eyes and you’re not here

I really wish you were

I open my heart and you consistently appear

Life has taken a lot out of me

Luckily, I never gave up on healing

Let me be there for you

I never left and I don’t plan to

We’re spinning around in the cycle of the lonely waltz

 

Praying to wake up or come back down

To your reply

Trying not to be obsessive

But deep down, I know it’s a factor

Save and drain me

I feel like it feels good

 

Finally falling

Free falling

Without tripping

Dumb love

True love

Who even knows anymore?

Heart in a Chokehold

I can’t wait forever

For Cupid to shoot his shot

In my favor

One moment, you’re in my corner

Then, you’re unable to be in yours

Or you’re running around the world

I swore I would quit chasing

So, I’m not

But that doesn’t make this hurt less

 

Pulled back and forth

By what ifs and my sense of self worth

I don’t want to become forgotten or ignored

Our bond has gotten stronger

But will it ever become endangered?

 

Weighing all of the pros and cons

You’ve changed your life and mine for the better

Being around you and talking to you

Never breaks my heart

We think and interpret in several similar ways

But… you’re good at hiding how you truly feel

For a long time

 

When someone or something means a lot to me,

I’m a bad liar

You mean a lot to me

Whatever you want to call what we have

Yes, it means a lot to me

I always know what to say

Because I mean what I say

 

I don’t know everything

I don’t know if we belong together

But I do know that we’ll never know if we never try

Isn’t that the mindset

That got you where you are today?

 

I don’t mind seeming to come on strong

If I’m fully being the real me

Confident in what I believe

And what I deserve

You can’t love anyone properly

Until you drop your walls

 

I’ll learn to breathe without you

I’ll trust that you won’t break your promises

I’ll listen to my intuition

But you’ll always have a piece of my heart

And maybe one day, you’ll come around

Spilled Soul

If we had the opportunity

To have more time,

I would love it if we made it

Let’s swap life stories

And start a new chapter

Together

I wouldn’t want to overload you

 

Bright eyes

Your heart is close enough to touch

 

Today

Days, weeks, months…

Sweet significance

Tonight

 

Searching for consistency

It shouldn’t be perilous

Keep making me fall harder

It’s effortless for you

Irresistible

I keep coming back to you

And usually leaving pain-free

 

Need me, want me, and more

That feeling is very mutual if the topic comes up

Who else pays attention to your hints?

Who else is able to completely understand you

No matter what?

Who else can wait for you

Without giving up on you?

 

Bright smile

I miss you

Radiate more often

Apathy in Reverse

Apparently, you can’t love someone else

Unless you love yourself

But what if that love was taken away?

Murdered in cold blood

And then, you’re left choking

On the happy warmth that once was

In addition, there are many types of love

And we all need it to survive

Pain likes to stick around

To latch onto your aura

Like a ghost haunting the lonely

But you are not alone

Your heart can make or break you

Don’t let it change you

Without distance,

In the near future,

There are sunflowers

Eternally in bloom

Cold Case

I can’t close an ongoing chapter

Why can’t anything involving you just be simple?

This is exhausting, yet so invigorating

We’re floating in purgatory

Your soul keeps glitching

I hate to say it,

But it’s your own fault

 

How are you able to simultaneously

Lift me up and let me down?

It’s like I’m breathing underwater

Aware of your footsteps

Feeling disconnected from your world

You tear me apart

Do you ever listen to your heart?

Let me love you the way I want to

You’re lonely because you hold yourself back

 

I look for distractions

I focus on myself

But none of it feels right

Without you next to me

You don’t notice my emotions

Until I tell you

In life, ambition means nothing

When you leave open letters open

 

A fever that rises and falls

I hate that I fell for you

Because I can never fully get over you

You did nothing wrong

You just left me in heartache city

While being one of the best things to ever happen to me

Our imperfections make us perfect

You gave me a reason

But your eyes told me different

I think that you’re scared of deep love

It’s hot and cold