The Living Dead

The four seasons have gone by

Like a train passing through the countryside

The past is all over the floor

And I’m beginning to fully forgive you

 

We both deserve better

Even if it isn’t each other

I don’t want to overthink this anymore

Break the arrow in half

 

I don’t need a rush to feel alive

I got caught up too much

You’re a risk taker

And a risk giver

Inner peace becomes violent

We’re nothing more than opposites

With similarities

Yet, our connection is larger than life

 

Progress has been made

Never too far away

Only you can change you

Only I can change me

We’re pretty great in our own ways

Painting different pictures

By blending colors

And like raindrops,

We’ll always fall together

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Road Trip

Mascara tears in my mind

Favorite places begin to feel like strangers

I can hear everything you’re not saying

It’s infuriating

 

The world won’t always cater to you

No matter what image of yourself you print

I could’ve sworn you said you’d always be here

Yet, there you are with your arms around somebody else

You weren’t ready for heaven

So, you settled for a basic blank slate

But you can’t clean up your mess this time

 

I don’t love or hate you

I like and resent you

Another scar carved into my tree of life

I don’t wish you the worst or wish you well

I wish you traffic jams and peace

 

I take several steps back

But it’s hard to completely let go

I deserve so much better than this

Where are my keys?

 

I wake up from sweet dreams

Better off without you

 

You’re just as confusing as everyone who confuses you

An apple a day won’t keep the snake bites away

I took the long way home

Turned the corner and saw an angel

I am almost reborn

Plot Twist

She seems easy to impress

Is that why you halfheartedly decided to shoot your shot

And it happened to work out?

I was impressed by everything you did too, but what for?

 

She glows by sunlight

Just like you

I glow by moonlight

Guess neither of you can handle the truth

 

What a coincidence

That you can put “poison” in front of her name

And it would make sense

I see a repeat of history in your future

She seems to adore the spotlight attached to your name

 

Maybe I am jealous

But I’m also hurt and betrayed

Sure, I’ll fully get over it someday

But why should I stay silent in the shadows

For your comfort?

 

You lied

In exchange for my honesty

She may have known you for a long time

But I’ve known you longer

We were growing until you started shrinking

You take me all the way to nothing

Because fuck my feelings

 

You can still be a muse

But you won’t catch me wasting any more love poems on you

I never wanted to feel this way

I saw the good in you all the time

Turns out I only paid attention to the good

And when you made your choice behind my back,

I got sunburned

I’m not wrong unless by some miracle, you prove otherwise

And last at least a year together

She can paraphrase what you literally just said

And you see art

I could’ve opened the doors to new dimensions for you

You’re not as deep as you think you are

Keeping my distance so that you’ll have no control over me

My broken heart will also leave a trail of blood

You’ll never have the guts to forget me

I’ll take over the world by storm

Better than you

 

I doubt you’ll even read this

You’re always busy, which translates to self-involved

And if by chance, you are reading this

It’s too late

The plot twist is you didn’t save my life

I did

Fuck your pride

Memorable

Take your hand off of my heart and go

Me being alone is nothing new

Gives me room to breathe and grow

I’ll never let you take away

The smile that you put on my face

 

We have something

But it’s not as special to you

As it is to me

 

You don’t get my tears

They’re sacred and you lost that privilege

Don’t come crawling back to me

If the finish line isn’t what you thought it would be

You can keep some of my love

But you’re not a priority

Because at this point, that’s clearly how you feel about me

After all of the positives, how bittersweet

 

There won’t be a happy or sad ending

You’re so focused on beginning

That you never finish anything

Every sign was there, but I chose not to see them

 

Good thing we have so many memories

Otherwise, you’d probably forget about me

Don’t worry, you’ll always be important to me

You’re not going to lose me

But it’s time to face the music

You really missed out

And I can’t help it

If I end up making you regret it

 

A stanza for each letter of your name

That continues to haunt me

But I vow to stop letting it own me

I won’t wait if there’s nothing worth waiting for

There it is

There’s that lesson I needed to learn

If sacrifice, honesty, loyalty, compassion, integrity, kindness, intelligence, beauty, empathy, talent, and transparency

Weren’t enough for you

Then, I don’t know what to tell you

Just kidding

never run out of choice words

Breathe

Junkyard of smashed alarm clocks

Intelligence is nothing without discipline

Catch my breath and let go

 

I can handle rejection

I’m used to it

That sounds like a joke, but it’s sad

Because it’s true

You can’t tell me not to feel hurt

When I am hurt

Single lovers learn to embrace solitude

 

Fuck it, I’ll get candid

I’ve been single since the day I was born

That sounds like a joke, but it’s the truth

Discovered how to change my thinking from

“I wasn’t enough for them”

To “they weren’t enough for me”

You learn to appreciate your own company

found my bed of roses

And have taken care of myself many times

 

Comparison is truly the thief of joy

Especially when you begin to understand

That everyone has their own path

Loneliness is inevitable

But you’re never truly alone

There will always be someone who understands

Who will listen

Who won’t leave you abandoned

 

Piles of books, filled journals, and miscellaneous papers

Any relationship is nothing without communication

Catch my breath and let go

 

Truth hurts, but I’ll always prefer it

Lying to me is one of the worst things you can do to me

Because my intuition is six steps ahead

The bodyguard for my loving heart

And I don’t take inauthenticity lightly

Do you really want to lose the trust

Of the one who would give you everything?

I’ll see you for who you truly are

I’ll hear everything you think, but don’t say

I’ll prioritize your actions over your cheap words

And I’ll write about it all

With beauty and scary accuracy

 

Don’t tell me that I’ll find someone someday

I’ve heard it too many times to count

You’re not making me feel any better

I know I will

Don’t tell me I need to make myself less

In order to obtain something more

Sounds like you’ve spent your whole life lying to yourself

While I’ve spent mine finding and loving myself

 

Keep intentions clear

Get sad, angry, and let it all out

Breathe again

 

Hell hath no fury like a woman

Who has the power to freeze it over

State of Martyrdom

We’ve taken a break from outside communication

To form a deeper understanding of each other

Creating connections for the long run

I’m sleeping awake

While you’re dreaming in front of me

The upside is going down

Insides are spilling out

 

The numbness wears off

When my feelings hone in on you

The air I’m breathing is fresher than before

Yet, the butterflies refuse to migrate

I never said that you’re my only source of happiness

I never said that anything is guaranteed

No one and nothing are in our way anymore

Life has become more “with” than “without”

I can’t change your mind for you

 

Crying about difficulties is much easier

When you know for a fact

That you’re not the only one

Drop the act for just a moment

For the uncensored truth

I seem to find you every time you’re jaded

Look, we match!

Same thing happens when we’re better

 

We’d love to be in love

Circumstance pulls us apart

And slams us back together

Hearts underground like tectonic plates

Surrender to fate

Be Prepared (But Nothing Can Prepare You)

I miss the good old days

You know, when you could go entire seasons

Without worrying about being shamed

By others or yourself

For not shaving your legs, etcetera

Actually, who said that I aged out of the good days?

I shave when I want to

It’s my body

Basic health and hygiene are more important than beauty standards anyway

And your body is yours, so do what works for you

 

I don’t have a traditional model body type

Or an hourglass figure exactly

But I exist and am worth the world

Curves, moles, birthmarks, blemishes, the fat, the flat, and all

Invisible and faded, but still visible scars

 

They tell me to wear more makeup

So that my baby face will grow up

But personal freedom lies in personal preference

And most of the time, I prefer none

Sometimes, I prefer lipstick

Sometimes, I prefer full cover

If the occasion is extra special

They say that beauty takes time

But life is short, so I’m doing what I want

When I want to

Looking flawless is your own definition to write

 

My mind doesn’t easily operate efficiently

Sad until numb

Can’t always think straight

Breath doesn’t always march in time

With my heartbeat

Living often feels like dying

But that doesn’t mean my mentality is never healthy

I’m always tending to the flowers

One way or another

 

If I apologized for writing about certain topics

Too much for your taste

Such as love, unrequited love, and heartbreak

Then I’d be apologizing for having feelings

And growing from experiences

If I apologized for getting political

Or talking about a dark truth

That makes you uncomfortable,

Then I wouldn’t be my authentic self

And your insistence on ignorance is part of the problem

 

If your advice is meant to categorize,

I solemnly swear that it’s unsolicited

I’m a little bit of everything

Intensely chill

A chilling intensity

A lady

A minx

A shining example

A stubborn bitch

The familial, platonic, or romantic something more

The modern *insert avant-garde name here*

The quiet one who keeps surprising you

Let’s communicate